President Simmons Sues the Storm Cellar for Copyright Infringement

simmons-shirt

SIMPSON — Early this morning, President Jay Simmons announced that he would be suing the Storm Cellar bookstore for its recent promotion and sale of a t-shirt featuring an image of his face.

In a hastily arranged interview with our reporters, a fuming Simmons explained that the Storm Cellar had committed copyright infringement by using his image without first asking his permission (or paying him lots of money).

“It’s just not right! I make every effort to maintain my charming, Southern facial features, get them legally patented, and then this happens.  Now, don’t ya’ll misread what I’m sayin’,” raged Simmons.

He continued (without even taking a breath)

“I love Simpson College, and would never take legal action against Simpson folks lightly.  But these bookstore bandits better get themselves a mighty fine lawyer, because I ain’t lettin’ ’em off the hook for this.”

The marketing and management teams for the Storm Cellar have been too terrified to comment on the matter.

By Paul Randalson

Tags: , , , ,

Categories: News

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