There’s a Storm a Comin’ to Simpson – Football Preview

2015-08-28_21-18-55Indianola – The Simpson College Storm football team is gearing up for yet another year of America’s favorite pastime. With just 3 weeks until their home opener and first game of the season, the Storm has been hard at work in the weight room and on the gridiron. Prospects are looking good and the students of Simpson College can expect to see another great year of Storm Football.

Though the Indianola community is thrilled for another season of football at Simpson, the city has an issued an advisory warning to all citizens to begin boarding up their windows. Homeowners are advised to take out hurricane insurance for the duration of the football season as well.

“Simpson has never really clarified just what kind of storm they are,” said Mayor Kelly Shaw of Indianola. “Because of that, we have to prepare for just about anything the Storm can throw at us.”

While the landlocked state of Iowa doesn’t usually have to worry about hurricane-strength weather, Indianola has had to since 1992. Prior to 1992, Simpson had been the Redmen but changed their name that year to “the Storm.” The name change came with little to no clarification from the college and has left the citizenry of Indianola on edge ever since.

“Aye, when they changed their name, those scallywags brought upon us the very wrath of an irate Mother Nature!” exclaimed Captain Fear Strom, a fisherman in the Lake Aquabi region. “Every fall since has left the city in shambles and ruined the local fishing industry!”

Cody Carlson, a junior defensive end with the Storm, took to the streets to warn the townsfolk that he and the rest of the Storm will be “bringing the hammer” this year and to “prepare for a Storm the likes of which they have never seen.”

Simpson Athletics has responded to citizens’ extremely valid concerns by encouraging residents to make sure their umbrellas are in working order, to keep extra ponchos in car trunks and to stay indoors at all costs on Saturdays around 1:00 pm this fall.

If you are planning on attending the Storm Football games this fall at Buxton Stadium, Godspeed and Good Luck to You.

Story By Mac Ziller

Twitter – @ziller81

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Categories: Features, Sports


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