New UGA Position Available

Library UGADunn Library is looking to hire one student for the undergraduate assistantship position as the Library Lifeguard. The Library Lifeguard will be responsible for preventing drowning incidents and preventing casual swimming in the Kappa Theta Psi fish pond located underneath the stairs in Dunn Library. Cyd Dyer, College Librarian and Archivist, says that this new position is “absolutely crucial for Simpson Success”.

“We’ve recently noticed an upward trend of student shenanigans in the fish pond. Ever since Simpson got rid of the swimming pool we’ve had to fish out more students from our friendly fishes’ home. It’s especially bad when students go through times of extreme stress, such as during finals week,” Dyer said.

Counseling Services has also noticed this upward trend. Citing privacy concerns, they would not tell Acorn staff the mental health of the swimming students. However, they did mention that alcohol was not a factor in this issue because, as we all know, “college students don’t drink”.

Applications for the UGA position as Library Lifeguard are open until February 27. Interviews will be completed by March 27, and the selected student will be notified by April 3. Until the position is filled, circulation work study students will have large nets at the front desk to fish out students who decide to go for an illegal swim.​

By: Molly Monk

Tags: , , , , , , , ,

Categories: News


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  1. Top Moments of 2015 at Simpson College | The Simpson Acorn - January 2, 2016

    […] Simpson’s EMERGE program is beta testing “Snap-Yak“, Yoda visited campus, The library now has a life guard, The Keystone Pipeline runs through the middle of campus, Holy Grounds coffee turned into bar, Mrs. […]


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